There’s nothing like stepping down onto the sidewalk and hearing a squish under your shoe. Especially if the substance was produced by a human being. This week, San Francisco announced a team of five Public Works staffers to patrol the fetid alleys in the city and remove the piles of human excrement. In the most “2018” story so far this year, the San Francisco Chronicle has the details: They’ll begin their shifts in the afternoon, as the city starts losing its sheen from overnight cleaning. The Poop Patrol’s mission? To spot and clean piles of feces before anybody complains about them. “We’re trying to be proactive,” explained Public Works director Mohammed Nuru. “We’re actually out there looking for it.” Between January 1 and August 20, 2017, a staggering 12,170 people called the local government to report piles of steaming excrement. This year, during the same time period, 2,427 more than last year have called. That’s approximately 65 calls regarding poop every day. Imagine how many piles weren’t reported. “I’ve been talking to the Department of Public Works director on a regular basis, and I’m like, ‘What are we going to do about the poop?’” said San Francisco Mayor London Breed. “He and I talked about coming up with some different solutions,” she continued. “I just want the city to be clean, and I want to make sure we’re providing the resources so that it can be.” There are only so many public bathrooms around the city, used by 75 people per day. Most of the bathrooms are used for the intended purposes, but 10% of the users visit the facilities to take care of romantic urges. Why is this liberally-run city a literal cesspool? Maybe it’s time to start talking about the chaos that necessarily follows Democratic so-called leadership. How about implementing policies to get the homeless off the streets, and not encourage them to live in San Francisco? My family used to love going to the “City By the Bay.” Now it’s the “Homeless, Drug-Addled, Disgusting Toilet by the Bay.” No thanks. Like many who used to love it there, we just stay away. In the meantime, it’s disgusting that these city workers are spending their day cleaning up after people who refuse to use the bathroom… but part of me is at least gratified that the city is cleaning up messes rather than creating them. Heck, put all of our bureaucrats on poop patrol. At least they’d be doing something productive. Image Credit: PXHere Leave a Reply Cancel ReplyYour email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Please enter an answer in digits:twenty + 20 = Δ