In advance of Valentine’s Day, The Washington Post ran a piece titled “How asexual and aromantic people make Valentine’s Day their own.”

Really, it should have been called “How deeply unhappy people make Valentine’s Day their own.”

Of course, I do not mean to say that all asexual and aromantic people are unhappy. But the kind of people the Post described in its article most definitely are.

To clarify, asexual people are those who experience no sexual desires. Aromantic people are those who experience no romantic interests. Therefore, it is an interesting topic to explore what such people do on a holiday predominated primarily by the commercialization of sexual desires and romantic interests.

But that’s not what The Washington Post does.

Instead, the newspaper offers an unholy sacrament of worship to the greedy god and goddess of self.

It touts the “truth” that all one must do to be happy is be true to one’s own self.

And in so doing, it creates the perfect recipe for unhappiness.

The first victim of such unhappiness is Odele Pax, a 37-year-old asexual and idemromantic Valentine’s Day skeptic.

The Washington Post reports that Pax has no desire for sex or romance, which is fine. That in and of itself is not the grounds for unhappiness.

But what Pax does with her asexual and idemromantic feelings is a dead giveaway that she is an unfulfilled person.

“This year,” the article announced, “she’s doing what she usually does on Feb. 14: making time for self-love and self-care [emphasis added].”

“For her that means soaking in a hot bath before curling up in bed with her three stuffed animals, Fyndoll, Marsha and Sylvia…”

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Let’s make one thing clear: any adult who finds satisfaction not in having a spouse, or having kids, or in serving their community, or in serving the Lord, but in fondling dolphin stuffed animals is not truly a satisfied person.

Although I can only speculate, I am confident that Fyndoll, Marsha, and Sylvia are not doing Pax all that much good.

But why? After all, she is loving herself and caring for herself. Is that not all she needs to be happy?

The contradiction at the heart of this argument is that if humans really were satisfied with self, we would not end up in a place of dissatisfied searching to begin with.

Loneliness would be nonexistent.

Instead, it seems that as love of self increases, loneliness also increases. As we abandon conformity to external standards of right and wrong and instead internalize morality, making self sovereign over traditions, nature, and even God, happiness withers and is replaced by a thousand derivative, abnormal, unnatural grasps at meaning.

Indeed, a society that is constantly fighting human biology and inventing new “identities” – as ours is – is proof that self is not sufficient.

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By selling self-love like a drug to the lonely, we encourage them to seek only their own praise and approval. But it was the insufficiency of their own praise and approval that made them lonely in the first place.

Just this week, the CDC reported that our youth are “in a state of absolute emotional and mental crisis.” Depression and suicidal thoughts have skyrocketed. As Ben Shapiro noted: “If our society does not quickly reverse field, the consequences for our young people will be utterly disastrous.”

Truly, our overemphasis on self is killing us.

This greedy god will rob us of everything – our joy, meaning, contentment, and purpose – and leave us with nothing but what we started with: self itself.

Surely, if that was not enough to make us happy in the first place, the obvious remedy is not to make a god of self but to crucify it on an altar to something bigger than ourselves.

Such a message may not be welcome on the pages of The Washington Times, but believe me, it will do us more good than dolphin stuffed animals ever could.

Jakob Fay is a staff writer for the Convention of States Project, a project of Citizens for Self-Governance.

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