Feds Study Sex Life of Quails on Cocaine

Have you ever wondered about the sex lives of quails?

Have you ever wondered about the sex lives of quails when they’re high as a kite, and not from flying?

If the answer to either of these questions is yes, you might be a government employee.

According to the Washington Examiner, the federal government is spending a lot of money on the weirdest and most wasteful projects:

The National Institutes of Health spent $356,000 to better understand the combination of coke and sex. Because federal law obviously prohibits giving out samples of cocaine to human test subjects, those scientists recruited male Japanese quail instead. Turns out, when little birds that weigh less than a tennis ball get hopped up on illegal narcotics they tend to engage in some “high risk sexual activities.”

Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., isn’t happy about this. No, the Kentucky Republican doesn’t begrudge the promiscuous little birds. He blames the federal government who bought them coke with taxpayer money.

Paul said, that it should be “common sense would have told us that one, cocaine is probably not good for you, and that cocaine might make you do things that you wouldn’t have done otherwise had you not been on cocaine.”  But the point that he’s missing?  Common sense is in short supply in Washington D.C.  In fact, D.C. probably has more cocaine than common sense.

You know, it’s stuff like this that makes it easy to hate the government.  You could just laugh, but that’s your money being spent to feed cocaine to a quail to study the effects on its sex life.  Really.  Someone, in fact, many someones, should answer for this.  And by answer, I’m thinking they should be run out of government.

Permanently.

Hat Tip: Washington Examiner

Image Credit: Pixnio